Find a Sober Living Home
A sober living home, also known as a halfway house or Oxford House, is a drug-free home dedicated to supporting residents on the road to addiction recovery.
There is a wide range of options available, so we recommend you take some time to consider your personal needs before deciding on a sober living home.
This will provide you with an overview of your personal needs, including everything from your available budget to personal comfort level. Skipping over this essential step may result in an uncomfortable environment, which may undermine your recovery journey.
In this article, we outline five important considerations to think about before making your decision. These will allow you to identify your personal needs and identify the best sober living home for you.
These considerations include the following:
- Scheduling vs independence
- Rules and guidance
- Location
- Cost and budget
- Your comfort level
We’ll start at the top and work our way down the list. By the end, you’ll have a better understanding of what to consider so you know how to find a sober living home that makes sense for you.
1. Schedules vs. Independence
Every sober living home is going to have some type of structure, but whether it is bare-bones or more scheduled depends on the environment itself.
For example, most will tell residents what time they must get up in the morning. People living in sober living environments should not sleep the day away. In some environments, there might be exceptions for individuals who work at night; in others, there will not be exceptions. There will also generally be a curfew.
The residence you choose might have scheduled meal times where everyone comes together at a certain time to eat.
There might also be house meetings that you must attend. Group outings are sometimes offered as an option. In addition, shower use might be scheduled, particularly if you live in a home that has several people who must all get ready for work or therapy at the same time. Chores might also be scheduled.
Think about what level of independence versus structure you want and look for a sober living environment that will meet your needs.
2. Rules and Guidelines
Just as every environment will have some type of structure or schedule to adhere to, there will also be rules and guidelines that you might find too restrictive, not restrictive enough, or just right.
Keep in mind that a sober living environment is meant to be a stepping-stone toward completely independent living. Someone just out of rehab might require more stringent rules than someone who has been out of rehab for several months.
So keep that in mind as you look at different places and read through their rules and guidelines.
One rule that every sober living environment will have is the requirement to be drug- and alcohol-free. You can expect random drug tests to take place at various intervals. There might be rules about visitors as well – you might be able to have visitors only at certain times and in the public areas of the residence, for example.
You might be required to attend support group meetings or to attend your prescribed therapy sessions. All of this is designed to help you get in the habit of making good choices now so that you can continue to make good choices later, once you move out and into your own home.
It is also important to find out how long you will be allowed to live in a sober living environment. Some residences have a cutoff time, such as six months. Others will allow individuals to continue living in the environment as long as they follow the rules and stay sober.
Talk to your counselors about your own personality and recovery process up to this point to determine whether a residence with a cutoff date would work to motivate you or be too much pressure at this point.
3. Location
You will need to think about where you want to live, both now and in the future when you live independently.
The challenges of staying away from the people and places where you used substances will be great, but you will be able to practice self-discipline while living in a supportive environment. Other people prefer to live far away from all of those temptations in an effort to start fresh. Either way can work, and you should talk to your counselors and case manager about the different options available.
If you have a job already, you will want to be sure that you can get to it via public transportation, bicycling, or walking if you do not have a car. Also, if you have supportive family members, you might want to live near them so they can support you and help you while you are living in a sober living environment.
Since your recovery will depend on your attending counseling and support group meetings, staying local to these services will help you avoid the trauma of having to start over somewhere completely new while navigating the early steps of being out of residential rehab and staying sober.
4. Cost and budget
In most cases, you will need to pay rent in a sober living environment just as you would if you were living in your own apartment or house.
Fees can vary substantially, so be sure to find out exactly what you will be paying for exactly which services and amenities. Utilities will generally be included. Groceries might or might not be included. There will also likely be an extra fee for most outings. Find out in advance what you can expect when it comes to cost.
Some sober living environments are paid for on a sliding scale fee basis. This means that the more money you make, the more you pay. This might be a good option if you have a low income right now.
5. Your Comfort Level
One of the most important considerations to keep in mind is your personal comfort level.
This is essential.
In many cases, you will find a sober living home offers a dedicated residence for women, which allows you to focus on your recovery in a comfortable environment.
Westwind Recovery® recognizes people with addictions often struggle with other aspects of life, including mental health, family obligations, and LGBTQ discrimination, and offer a variety of specialty substance abuse programs that provide a safe, welcoming environment to ensure you feel comfortable on your journey.
Conclusion
For the best results on your journey through recovery, it’s critical you take the time to think about these five considerations that may impact your recovery journey.
These will help you identify your personal needs and preferences, which will help you develop a better understanding of how to find a sober living home that fits you.
We hope you found this article helpful on your journey. If you have any questions, we’re here to help.
Photo by Dan Gold
Dr. Deena is the Chief Clinical Officer of Westwind Recovery®, an award-winning outpatient treatment center in Los Angeles where she oversees the clinical and administrative program and treatment methods. Dr. Deena is a doctor of psychology and licensed clinical social worker since 1993. LCSW #20628. Originally from the East Coast, Dr. Deena has worked running treatment centers, worked as a therapist in psychiatric hospitals as well as school settings and currently has a thriving private practice in the LA area. Dr. Deena has appeared regularly on the Dr. Phil Show as an expert since 2003. She has also been featured on many other TV shows, podcasts and has contributed to written publications as well as podcasts.
